Slings and Sharrows

In the face of an ever increasing incidence of cars deciding to show their love for bicycles by smashing into them, my fine city has jumped into action.  Putting aside the typical issues of a large bureaucracy attempting a difficult solution to a complicated problem, they've implemented a corrective course of action.  They're painting sharrows.  About 50 of them.  On one stretch of road.  For those of you who don't regularly read cyclist activist blogs, a sharrow is this:

Yep, it's a "clever" name for what is more technically (and accurately, you know, in english) known as a "share the road arrow," or to most drivers, "crap on the road."  So I guess it was "Sharrow" or "Croad."

Look, I'm not against these, they don't do much harm besides mucking up the nice aesthetics of pure blacktop.  Hell, if the city wants to paint a continuous strip of advice on the road saying:

"Don't run over people.  If you're drunk, please don't drive.  If you're an asshole, consider just doing us all a favor and removing yourself to somewhere you'll blend in.  Like New Jersey"

I'm fine with that.  I don't know if it's the best use of tax monies, but according to our government it does provide an incredible boost to the economy.  Because, as Adam Smith postulated, the basis for all economic growth rests on the financial success of roadwork painting crews.  But I digress (yes, I know this entire post, and really the whole blog is a digression, smart guy).

My real problem is the insipid name.  Sharrow.  It sounds like a weapon a Care Bear would use.  To fight, well, what the hell do Care Bears fight?  Selfish children?  I mean, it kind of sounds right, until you drop out the adjective: "Care Bears fight children....with sharrows".  Hmmm, maybe they fight something less controversial.  Like cancer? 

It sounds better, sure, "Care bears fight cancer", but frankly, looking at one of them, I want something a little more badass fighting cancer.  Like Voltron.  I mean, the bear is asleep.  Asleep!  Cancer's not sleeping, oh no!  No, in my world, Care Bears fight nasal congestion.  With sharrows.  And our roads are covered in Croads.  And all is well... oh, and Voltron is going to kick the living shit out of cancer.