iPad Marketing Mumbojumbo

In case you missed it, because you've been living in a hole in the woods (everyone needs a hobby), Apple came out with a new technothingamajob.  Sorry, that's pretty specific terminology.  It's a gigantic iPhone.  Which is just the love child of a cellphone and an iPod.  So, basically, the iPad is the obese child of a mixed-technology marriage (sure, a cell & iPod could have a love-child without being married, but I think the iPod is better than that).  Anyway, that's great, good for Apple, more techno-toys is always a good thing, but then they rolled out their new commercial.  

Check it out, in case you haven't watched television in the past month.  Specifically, check out about 12 seconds in.  Yeah.  "It's magical".  No.  No it is not.  The iPad is not fucking magic.  

Seriously, Apple, this is the best your mammoth marketing team could come up with?  Magic?  Fucking MAGIC?!?!  Can it make you fly?  Does it grant wishes?   Does it show you the future?  No?  Oh, but it plays music AND videos?  Great!  Sounds pretty nifty.  Not magic though.  Do you even know what words mean?  Do you know that simply saying something doesn't make it true?  While you're at it, why not claim it cures cancer, does your taxes, and will, if shaken just right, open a portal into another dimension.  

Then again, maybe I'm just bitter that I don't have one yet.  :(